Avoiding the Bridezilla EffectApril 25, 2016 by The Marquardt Ranch
The last name any bride wants to be called is that nod toward crazy and out-of-control: the Bridezilla.
Bridezilla is demanding.
Bridezilla is unreasonable.
Bridezilla is hurtful.
It seems inevitable the Bride will be overcome by the stress of planning and executing her wedding. There is so much to think about and so many people to please, from future in-laws to yourself. The Bridezilla emerges when all that pressure becomes too much.
But, the Bridezilla effect can be avoided with these simple strategies.
First, plan ahead. Utilize a wedding planning checklist and timeline. You chose to get engaged, and you can choose how long that period will last. As long as you’re a fiancée, you’re in planning mode, and Bridezilla will always be lurking in the background. By choosing a timeline of about six months, you shorten that period of waiting and still have plenty of time to plan.
Break up your to-do list by months so that you’re accomplishing tasks over a period of time, rather than all at once. This will save you decision fatigue and allow for flexibility.
Next, prioritize. Once you have your timeline, you and your fiancée can decide what is most important and where you will focus your time, energy, and efforts for the next few months. Maybe that’s finding the perfect photographer, choosing your dream dress, or planning an amazing reception. Then, you can delegate other items that aren’t as important to you. Doing this means you’re already making a conscious decision to realize every item cannot have equal priority. Therefore, you will have to let some things go.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. By asking and delegating, you allow those who love you to participate. Be sure you demonstrate appreciation for their time and effort. Don’t redo something you’ve already asked someone else to handle. Instead, give specific instructions (not demands) up front, and then trust this person to honor your requests. If you’re not sure you can trust them, ask someone else.
You may also want to consider hiring a wedding planner or coordinator. While a planner will be with you every step of the process, a coordinator usually comes in just before your event to handle all the last minute details. Determine if your budget allows for this, and if not, consider at the very least having a trusted family member or friend around on the big day. This person can help everything run smoothly and also direct the ceremony if needed. This will save you the stress of trying to answer your caterer’s questions while getting your hair done.
Finally, plan to relax. Don’t forget to take care of yourself during this stressful time. No matter how well you plan, weddings get hectic and things go wrong. Prepare for this by reducing your stress beforehand. Plan a getaway with your bridesmaids, keep up your exercise routine, eat well, and get plenty of sleep.
To avoid becoming a Bridezilla, remember you’re a bride—which means you’re about to commit your life to someone else and nothing—not flowers, dresses, or pictures—is more important than that.